♪♪ Friends, family,
we are gathered here today to celebrate the union
between Emily and Murph. Sure we won't have
any interruptions? Don't worry. (whispers)
I took care of Adam. (muffled grunting) And is my distinct honor
to unite Emily and Murph in the most holy of tradition. (spits)
I object. (crowd gasping) (Adam spits) Nearly all wedding traditions
are nothing but pointless and expensive displays
of wealth. Adam, we don't have time
for this. Um, actually, we do. I budgeted it
into the schedule. Great. My engagement was
one thing, but I've been dreaming
about this day my whole life. My friends are here. My very traditional family
is here.
You're making us
proud, son. Of course, we would've
preferred a Catholic
priest, but… This is tradition, Adam. The dress, the ceremony,
the cake. It all symbolizes true love. Nope, those traditions
represent one thing– money. In fact, this entire ceremony
has been hijacked by a greedy industry
looking to make a buck. (cash register ringing) But this is the way
weddings have always been! Wrong again. American weddings were once
informal affairs, held in homes
or at community events like barn raisings
or corn-husking bees. I hereby pronounce you
man and wife. You may now eat the corn. (whirring effect) Uh, nice try, Adam, but…
that's not a real wedding. She's not even
wearing white. That means
she's not a virgin. Ow.
No, you lout. It means I'm not rich. Back then, white fabric was
almost impossible to clean, so a white dress was only
meant to be worn once.
Poor folks can't afford that. We got to make
our dresses last. Brown don't show the dirt. It wasn't till I,
Queen Victoria, wore a white dress
to my wedding that other brides began to copy
me to show off their wealth. But even then, it was strictly
for the well-to-do. Thinks she's so good
in her more-than-one dress. (coughing) And her more-than-one lung. Even white wedding cakes
were all about braggin'. White sugar back then
was so expensive, it was basically
edible bling. Oh, my cake is as white
as all my friends. Well, Emily's wearing
a white dress and we're not rich. Nope, but you're making it
rain like you are. And all because
of bridal magazines. Meet Vicki Howard, she's the
author of "Brides Incorporated" and an expert in wedding
commercialization. Weddings used to be
simple affairs. But then bridal magazines
encouraged brides to marry like the wealthy and created a wedding industry
of unrelated products like silverware,
gifts for the home, and even early wedding gowns. And they did all this when Americans were
at their poorest. It was the birth
of an entire industry.
And now the cost of weddings
keeps skyrocketing. Give me that.
Listen… people want the finest
on their big day. And that comes at a price. It's not like
we're cheating people. Oh, no, it's exactly
what you're doing. The wedding industry
systematically overcharges
young couples just because they can. One study found that a majority
of flower shops, photographers,
ooh, and cake shops… No way, Jose! …charged more for a wedding
than they did for a birthday party
of the same size. It's called the wedding tags. Basically, anything
Ashley here booked for you is a rip-off. Um, I have to go,
uh, count mason jars or something like that. Mm-hmm. That's insane. How can they get away
with this? Well, this culture's spending
is now so pervasive, if you don't do it,
your family will be pissed.
Murph, where are
the floral centerpieces? You can't have a wedding
with floral centerpieces. Mom, they were
two grand extra. You're breaking
your mother's heart. Tell Ashley to put it
on the Discover. (cash register rings) Well, maybe going through
this whole expensive ordeal together will make us
stronger as a couple. Ooh, sorry, babe. Researchers
at Emory University found that the more
you spend on your wedding, you're actually more likely
to end in divorce. How do you know that? This… was my bachelorette party. Oh, yeah, that was fun. But he has a point. I mean, no one we paid
to help plan this wedding gives two craps if we stay
together or not. That is not true. I care very deeply about…
Emily and Smurf. The Discover card
was declined. Should I use the Amex? Remain calm, Murph. It's your special day.
It's your
special day! Don't go nuts at your own
wedding, even though… Is he okay?
Oh, yeah. That's just
his thinking walk. No, not today, Conover! Because, guess what,
buddy? I just figured out
your little lesson. Oh, well, tell me.
I love to learn. (clears throat) A century of advertising has
distracted us from what's really important. It's not about the money
or the gifts or the thread count
of the table runners. It's about love. All this, it's just about
you and me declaring our eternal,
undying love for each other. That's what weddings used
to be about. And that's what I want
our wedding to be about, too.
Because I love you, Emily,
and I always will. (crowd)
Aww… Ah, babe.
I love you, too. So, Adam, you want
to take back that objection? Oh… gosh,
I wish I could, but science says your feelings
are almost certain to change. Want me to tell you
about it? Oh, please do!
Please do! All right, people,
this is gonna be a while. So let's just start
the dinner course and we will finish the ceremony
later, okay? Thanks.
Ahh!.
